More than a year ago, in a post titled A plan to be, I wrote about how at different stages of life, one has the need to stand out, and the need to belong. Both driven by various combinations of happiness, self-image, and of course, the gene that just wants to get to the next generation. Though I didn’t really express it in the post, the “plan to be” had belonging as a large part of it. Exactly a year ago, I wrote The half of it, in which I took the thread further. I found “relevance” being rooted in “belonging”, and wondered whether we settle for that. At the cost of meaning.
Meaning is what we make of our lives. And in relevance and meaning, I find the shadows of “others” and “self image” respectively. And that’s why I saw it as much of a step back as a step forward. A post on HBR that I had shared on Twitter 5 years ago (and bubbled up thanks to Timehop) – “Stop worrying about how much you matter“ – helped me move forward. The answer – mastering irrelevance. I think this is important once the “crutches” of professional and even social life go away. Of course, easier said than done. And there’s a paradox in using the two words together – mastering and irrelevance. Because mastery makes it relevant, even if to yourself.
But still, it seems a worthwhile effort. Life without an agenda. Living one day at a time. Mirroring the gene. Seems like a natural state. Before consciousness intruded. But then again, consciousness as we (try to) define it is what made us human. Maybe the lack of an agenda will make it possible to feel and yet be detached at the same time. Going incognito on ego and self image. And still being.
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