Category: Religion

  • One on One with The One – Part One

    One day on chat, a window popped up …….
    G: Hi there, did u call me?
    M: who r u? dont remember calling anyone..
    G: heard you praying to me, thought i’d come over and chat…
    M: nice line, but how do i know who u r ?
    G: ha! just about sums up the state of humanity… they see me all around and still question my existence!! but just to prove a point, you saw that image of keira knightley and wished…(lost connection)
    connection resumes
    G: and wished that
    M: ok ok i am a believer!!
    G: men are so easy ;), hey, nowadays, you rarely think about me
    M: are you a woman?
    G: does it matter? but why do you ask?
    M: oh, just the general tone of the conversation. but yeah, you are right, the personal rapport with you has kinda lessened..
    G: dont worry, its only human..
    M: i see a faint trace of ego there…..
    G: not at all, ego is your own creation, your perception, i am what i am….
    M: and i am what you made me
    G: of course not, i gave you options, you chose
    M: but werent they already made for me?
    G: thats your justification. amazing how you guys always blame me for the bad things and never are happy for the good things…
    M: so how do you manage all of us, our lives, our deaths
    G: ah, trade secret, boy, if i told you, u might actually convince me to outsource it
    M: are you american?
    G: i am heavenly, why do you ask?
    M: just a thought
    G: i think things might be a lot clearer if i told you that you are not an extension of me, rules that u made dont apply to me, think beyond your perceptions
    M: is that possible?
    G: of course, how do you think great marketing ideas come about?
    M: hey , do you have any?
    G: yup, but wont tell you, that would be unfair to others
    M: they wouldnt know
    G: those are your rules and justifications, not mine
    M: what about rights and wrongs that hold true forever
    G: there is only one eternal truth
    M: and that would be you?
    G: think about it
    …………to be continued……….
    and in
    manuscrypts trivia
    a guy joke and a girl joke
    DON’T TEMPT A WOMAN
    A woman goes to England to attend a 2-week, company training session. Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.
    The wife answers : “Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?”
    The husband laughs and says: “An English girl !!!”
    The woman kept quiet and left.
    Two weeks later he picks her up in the airport and asks: “So, honey, how was the trip?”
    “Very good, thank you.”
    “And, what happened to my present?”
    ‘Which present?” She asked?
    “The one I asked for — the English girl!!”
    “Oh, that” she said, “Well, I did what I could, now we have to wait a few months to see if it’s a girl”

    BAD NEWS ABOUT BEER
    Yesterday, University scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer.
    Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women. To test the theory, 100 men were fed 8 pints of beer each within a 1-hour period. It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects:
    1) Gained weight.
    2) Talked excessively without making sense.
    3) Became overly emotional.
    4) Couldn’t drive.
    5) Failed to think rationally.
    6) Argued over nothing.
    7) Had to sit down while urinating.
    8) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong.
    No further testing was considered necessary……….

    till next time, keep the faith

  • Democrassy

    When an Italian born Roman Catholic asks a Muslim president to make a (now) Pakistan born Sikh, the Prime Minister, in a country thats predominantly hindu, and still a vast section of the world that considers it a xenophobic, ‘prone to fanaticism’ country, i started wishing Induism were a little more aggressive. Induism, because it can never go back to what the original way of life stood for, it has evolved due to internal and external reasons…..
    When a buffoon like Bush unleashes savagery on whatever country he deems fit for having WMDs, supporting terrorism and a whole range of blah blah that only he understands, the world turns a blind eye, and then regains sight when a Best Bakery happens. “Hindu fanaticism at its worst!!”.
    The only political party that at least makes a semblance (in its own ways) of being Hindu friendly gets chucked out of power for (supposedly) India not having shined for the poor. and pray, what shine did the country get during the first 50 years of independence, when the congress was a virtual monopoly?
    are we talking about an existence, that has created a north-south divide that is perhaps impossible to erase,
    an era which boasted of the ’emergency’?, sure that must be something of a trophy for democracy in india,
    a rule which created poster boys like laloo yadav, ram vilas paswan etc whose sole claim to fame is the caste vote
    and a rule in which the Left stood watching while china screwed us, hell, they even applauded!!
    in today’s context , the same rule which is cosying to the Left,( who still think USSR exists.)
    the secular coalition, which has a party called Muslim League in it, with ministerial berths!!
    If this country is so secular, what is its problem with a hindu party. only because hindus are a majority. and are not aggressive enough!! because muslims are a minority and they need a party to get their rights, of which they already have more than enough!!
    nobody talks of hindusim getting diluted, coz its a mature enogh religion to absorb. tomorrow if i launched a party called the hindu nationalist party, i would get a stay order from the supreme court, and the US would talk about fanaticism and immaturity and barbarism. but hey, would they let a mohammed or ram rule capitol hill? hell, they havent been able to get an african american in, that should happen in the next millenium…….
    manuscrypts trivia
    speaking of capitol hill, heard of the latest ‘washingtonienne’ sex scandal, read about it here, and then read some rare excerpts here or here.
    and a good fwd i got
    Special High Intensity Training
    In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from our employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our one program of Special High Intensity Training. (S.H.I.T.) We are striving to give our employees more S.H.I.T. than any other company. If you feel that you do not receive your fair share of S.H.I.T., please see your manager. you will immediately be placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list. Our managers are especially skilled in seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle. Employees who don’t take S.H.I.T. will be placed in the Department of Employee Evaluation Program. (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.) Those who
    fail to take S.H.I.T. will have to go to Employees Attitude Training. (E.A.T.S.H.I.T.)
    Since our managers took. S.H.I.T. They dont have to do S.H.I.T. any more because they are full of S.H.I.T. already. If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be qualified to train others. We can add your name to our Basic Understanding Lecture List(B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.). Those who are full of B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T. will get S.H.I.T. jobs and can apply for a Promotion to Director of Intensity Programming(D.I.P.S.H.I.T) If you have any questions,please direct them to our Head Of Training(H.O.T S.H.I.T.)
    Thank you,

    Boss in General
    (B.I.G.S.H.I.T)

  • The God shaped Whole

    contrary to certain suggestions, i have not been stuck in anniversary celebrations :-)… just a whole lotta work!!!
    this post is a collage of viewpoints on god… i read a fwd on the age old dispute over the existence of god… so i thought this might be a good forum to get more opinions. am quoting two theories which were very thought provoking
    The epicurean argument
    Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
    Then He is not omnipotent.
    Is He able, but not willing?
    Then He is malevolent.
    Is He both able and willing?
    Then whence cometh evil?
    Is He neither able nor willing?
    Then why call him God?
    And the ‘freewill argument’, which is propounded by a whole lot of atheists – once human beings came to be, God invested them with free will, chose voluntarily to convert the world into an autonomous institution, to be run by humans, in which He would not interfere.
    Though this does explain away a great number of minor and major calamities, which descend on us-from a road accident that takes away a beloved to a war that kills and maims thousands. But it does make for a hard-hearted, remote, indifferent God.
    my take, what about a god who might have initially shown faith in humanity, but then given up??

    ………to be continued
    meanwhile some
    manuscripts trivia
    “I think that God in creating Man somewhat overestimated his ability.” ~ Oscar Wilde
    “God made everything out of nothing, but the nothingness shows through.” ~ Paul Valery
    “To surrender to ignorance and call it God has alwaysbeen premature, and it remains premature today.”~ Isaac Asimov
    and have to share this fwd , lets title it “mallu power”
    There is a popular saying that wherever you go, you will find a Mallu,but…

    Kuttappan is a Mallu…Kuttappan was bragging to his boss one day, “You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them.”Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, “OK, Kuttappan how about Tom Cruise?”
    “Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it.”
    So Kuttappan and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise’s door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts, “Kuttappan! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!” Although impressed, Kuttappan’s boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise’s house, he tells Kuttappan that he thinks Kuttappan’s knowing Cruise was just lucky.
    “No, no, just name anyone else, “Kuttappan says.
    “President Bush,” his boss quickly retorts.
    “Yes,” Kuttappan says, “I know him, let’s fly out to Washington.”
    And off they go. At the White House, Bush spots Kuttappan on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, “Kuttappan, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and
    let’s have a cup of coffee first and catch up.”
    Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Kuttappan who again implores him to name anyone else.
    “The Pope,” his boss replies.
    “Sure!” says Kuttappan. “I have relatives in Poland, and I’ve known the Pope a long time.” So off they fly to Rome. Kuttappan and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Kuttappan says, “This will never work. I can’t catch the Pope’s eye
    among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I’ll come out on the balcony with the Pope. And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.
    Sure enough, half an hour later Kuttappan emerges with the Pope on the balcony.But by the time Kuttappan returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his boss’ side, Kuttappan asks him, “What happened?” His boss looks up and says, “I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, ‘Who’s that on the balcony with Kuttappan?”

  • And on the eighth day, He made God

    Usually dine out on Saturdays, its a weekly ritual, kinda relaxant for me… this week, went to a place called “Whats cooking?”… other than all the things that are the norm, i liked the place coz it gave me a view of arguably one of the busiest streets in bangalore – Commercial Street. For one and a half hours, i watched diverse versions of our species in various moods and states of existence – some rich, some poor, some physically challenged, some kids, some grown ups, some grown up kids, some angry, some peaceful, some happy, many sad and suddenly i happened to remember a song, which remains a favourite because of its lyrics and concept – “What if God was one of us” by Joan Osborne. It set of a whole train of thoughts in my head, all over again….. about the concept of what we call God, and how he can be so non-human – lacking of ego, anger, hatred… coz if I had a lot of atheists living happily, a lot of guys halfway atheist and demanding proof of my existence, (as if the entire phenomena around them werent enough), a lot of guys beseeching/threatening/cursing me for miscellaneous favours and forgetting me once i get the things done, and to top it all, some wisecracks who proclaim “if god is in everything, he is in me, so worship me”, oh hell, (pardon the pun), i’d be one pissed off God. Thank God they didnt choose me to be God (according to Hindu mythology, the best kings on earth were chosen to be Indra, the king of Gods, after their tenure on earth… we dont have kings now, so……)..hehe…
    While on the concept of God, here’s a good fwd i got, its titled “Whispers” (no, theres no brand involved this time 🙂 )
    The man whispered, “God, speak to me” and a meadowlark sang.
    But, the man did not hear.
    So the man yelled, “God, speak to me” and the thunder rolled across the sky.
    But the man did not listen.
    The man looked around and said, “God let me see you.” and a star shined brightly.
    But the man did not see.
    And, the man shouted, “God show me a miracle.” and, a life was born.
    But, the man did not notice.
    So, the man cried out in despair, “Touch me God, and let me know you are here.” Whereupon, God reached down and touched the man.
    But, the man brushed the butterfly away …
    and walked on.

    I found this to be a great reminder that God is always around us in the little and simple things that we take for granted …
    and now for your weekly dose of
    manuscrypts trivia
    the first quote will apply to a lot of bloggers, the rest are more in line with the post above
    “A writer writes not because he is educated but because he is driven by the need to communicate. Behind the need to communicate is the need to share. Behind the need to share is the need to be understood. The writer wants to be understood much more than he wants to be respected or praised or even loved. And that perhaps, is what makes him different from others.” ~ Leo Rosten
    “It may be that our role on this planet is not to worship God, but to create him.” ~ Arthur C. Clarke
    “Is man one of God’s blunders or is God one of man’s blunders?” ~ Friedrich Nietzsche”
    God is not dead but alive and well and working on a much less ambitious project.” ~ Anonymous, Graffiti
    “I have too much respect for the idea of God to make it responsible for such an absurd world.” ~ Georges Duhamel
    “I don’t know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn’t.” ~ Jules Renard

    PS – If “God’s Own Country” still has internet alive and kicking, the next post will be from there!!

  • Spiritual Fugitive

    That is inspired by an article i read, the link for which i got from a good find i made, no, that would be credit misplaced, actually it found me… so guys, check out this blog of Deki , it makes very interesting read…..so back to the title, it refers to me at some stage of my life, actually i think, applicable even now, to some extent… the stage when i dont want to explicitly acknowledge the presence, relevance or influence of God in my life, but at the same time will not, rather, dare not denounce his existence completely…..i still experience the phase now, especially when i feel that life isnt fair..and promptly thank god, when the feeling has passed..hehe….
    these phases usually also mean that i spend time staring at the sky, trying to fathom my place in the scheme of things – you know, earth out of billions of planets, india out of hundreds of countries, bangalore out of …..the purpose existence at all, and sometimes i wonder, is the purpose of life, living itself? are we trying to attribute too much to it……hmmmmm
    manuscrypts trivia
    picked this up from the same article i mentioned earlier – ” part of a fast-growing population of global souls who exist in many cultures all at once “and so fall in the cracks between them.”