Author: manuscrypts

  • Carry on Doctor

    Any of you remember the ‘Carry on’ series? Old stuff, but used to get repeated on the movie channels, till the ‘latest movie on your screen’ wars began… Hilarious stuff, made you laugh till your jaw hurt… Only, my jaw started hurting a few days back without me laughing..
    now, i usually treat myself pretty well (yes, very funny, i knew that was coming) with the regular stuff available in medical stores, but this one proved a bit too complicated, particularly since i had a lot of (cliche/wisecrack) reasons thrown at me… like
    Me: My jaw hurts, at the junction of the ear and the jaw
    Friend: Judging by your intelligence, your wisdom tooth is long overdue
    or
    Me: Am not sure if its a wisdom tooth or an ear infection
    Colleague: yup, all that empty space in between, something’s bound to happen..
    Another Colleague: Hear hear!!

    Yup, i do get plenty of help, and anyways, after trying out simple home remedies like Crocin, Iodex at the joint and an innovative method of rubbing amrutanjan on an earbud and poking it into places where no bud has gone before, i gave up and decided to take some professional help…And the doc was the biggest wisecracker of them all…
    Unlike the modern day, cold, “show me the money” kind, this was an older, wiser doc with the most cheerful disposition i have seen from a man still at work at 8 pm on a Friday night…So from asking me whether i had recently encountered any nuts that were tough to crack, and almost making me believe that i should sneeze with my mouth closed, inspite of the risk of my eyes popping out (which he assured me could be done) he kept me entertained …
    And if he had any inkling of the real reason my jaw hurt, this might have been the conversation…
    Doctor: you know, its good to learn early in your marriage to treat your wife with care.
    Me: Agree Doctor, but why…
    Doctor: The junction at the beginning of the jawbone is very sensitive….
    until next time, dont drop your jaws…

  • Item Bomb

    Rakhi Sawant created a stir of sorts by announcing that she would be championing the cause of freedom of expression after the recent site banning controversy. When asked whether this was just another publicity stunt, she had this to say,
    “Ever since Aamir took up the Narmada cause, i have been looking for issues to raise. It is only now that i have got something meaty enough to hold my attention. It is not my intention to blow anything out of proportion, but some things need to be done to lift the morale of the poor bloggers who have been affected. In any case i dont have any realeases planned soon, so why would i want any cheap publicity? “
    When asked how she was qualified to tackle such a relatively geeky issue like blogs, she responded thus,
    “It has nothing to do with technology. It is the principle of the whole thing. I have been avictim of the authorities curtailing my freedom of expression, whether its on screen or on stage. And so i feel i am well qualified to do these kind of exposes before the public.”
    When asked whether she knew common blogger concepts like RSS feeds, she quickly shot back,
    “Of course, they are one of the principal reasons why i am supporting the cause. It was the same guys who were feeding the media during my stage show which caused so much of a controversy. They should stick to politics and not do moral policing.”
    She terminated the interview abruptly when a reporter asked whether she preferred Type Pad,
    “This is the problem with media people. You give them some freedom, and they start asking you personal questions. It is none of your business what……”

    until next time, only item, no bomb!!
    Disclaimer: This work is just a product of the author’s imagination.

  • The Day the World changed

    He experienced the first attack in his own route, in his own regular starting point… he was lucky not to be scarred for life… his mind was in a turmoil, it had never happened to him, he had heard about such things happening in other parts of the world, and to other people, but this was his regular haunt, a place that was almost a second home to him, where he spent time everyday..it couldnt happen here…
    he blinked and looked around to see if he had been dreaming.. a few glances and a couple of questions later, he was sure that it was very real indeed.. but he was still in denial.. he tried calling a couple of people or sending sms.. he partially succeeded and got in touch with guys from other locations as well as guys further ahead on his own travel route.. it was happening everywhere, and everyone was affected…
    he didnt quite know what to do.. honestly he wasnt prepared for this kind of stuff, and he wanted answers.. who had done this, more importantly why… he got the answers a while later – LeT, SIMI, and this was only a reaction.. but hell, how in the world was he connected, what had he done to deserve this… he, along with all the others who had been affected, was just going about his life..he didnt know who to blame and how to react… of course, he could join the entire gang and condemn and send mails and demand explanations, but the damage had been done…
    but there was something he could do, he promised himself that when it was all over, he would visit every single person he had been acquainted to in his route, and tell them how much he feared for them while all this was happening, and how much he missed reading them…so from cynic and anz and aqua to the monk and joe and everyone in between, i am dropping into share the grief we all went through 🙂
    7/17 shall always be remembered as the day when our worlds collapsed..

    until next time, as if writer’s blocks werent enough!!

  • Main shaayar to nahi…

    magar jabse maine padha isko, mujhko shaayari thodi si aa gayi!!

    and so

    agar blog ke ban ne kiya hai aapko pareshaan,
    to thoda PK blog karo, sab ho jayega aasaan!!

    until next time, eat, drink and blog…

  • Live and LeT live

    And we have finally boiled it down to the usual suspects – SIMI (wonder why MTV is not doing one on her this time) and the Lashkar-e-Toiba (LeT)..Not that its going to help anybody’s cause, but it does give a target for finger pointing and ‘strongly condemning’..ouch, that would hurt a lot more than being dead or injured in a blast.
    I have always been against the American use of muscle power in afghanistan and iraq, because it was behaving like a school bully… but in a weird way, it makes some sense, because there havent been any attacks there since 9/11… for two strikes from the US of A have made it extremely clear that if you mess with them, there will be hell to pay…
    Consider this for a moment, if the D company were even remotely involved in the 9/11 strike, and Pakistan was known to have been hiding them, Mush and his country would have been so roughly handled that they would have parted company with D just like that…
    Once just once, we should use all those stuff that we keep launching once in while, and parading every year, on our dear neighbour, because it might just stop this annual blast they seem to be having at our expense… then we can do the buses and the samjhauta expresses all over again…
    no, its never going to happen, because we have more cheeks from where the first two came from..and we wont even do anything to people inside this country even if we found them responsible,for we are a proudly secular nation, inspite of it having gained us zilch all this while.. and we will suffer and we will live, even at the cost of LeT living…

    until next time, peace and pieces…