Year: 2006

  • Happy Rakshabandhan…

    Some things never change…

    Guys used to look forward to Rakhi, they still do..





    .. but they just wish there were no strings attached…

    until next time, i am not obsessed, honest.. the fit was too good to ignore… 🙂
  • Independence Day preponed

    In a stunningly radical move, the ruling Congress led UPA has gotten the Parliament to pass a law that makes the Independence Day a variable date. The lower house of parliament passed the bill late last week amidst heated debate and a walkout by the opposition; the upper house’s approval made it law the following day. In a press release, the Opposition spokesperson had this to say,
    ” We are appalled by how this government could take such a step. This is against the spirit of the nation. Tell me, could you ever think of changing your birthday? It is something sacrosanct which evokes deep emotions in every citizen of this country.”
    The Congress party spokesperson defended ” We have always maintained that we are a people friendly government. This particular law has also been enacted to give a benefit to the society in total. In any case, there is a clause that states that the variable date has to be within 2-3 days of the original independence day. Statistics would prove that a lot of people are unhappy when the day falls on Thursday/Tuesday etc, when they have to take an extra day leave for a long weekend. For example, this time the independence Day is on Tuesday, with this law, we can change it to Monday, and give the entire country a long weekend.”
    until next time, freedom to…..
    Disclaimer: This work is just a product of the author’s imagination.
  • Striking….

    There is a university that i was once a part of, no, make that twice. Once, when i spent years 3 to 13 living there –  discovering a world on a tricycle, climbing buildings under construction, playing cricket for hours on end, walking among rows and rows of acacia trees, listening to grown ups talking science and mathematics and politics, going to kindergarten, feeling all grown up when going to school, discovering a world on a bicycle, seeing people walk by with red or black flags and wondering how cool it must be to carry a flag and shout on the road.

    The second time, a much briefer timeframe – 6 months, coming back to a wave of nostalgia, to a world I had spent time discovering, to walking up the stairs of buildings that were constructed almost two decades ago, to getting tired after a few overs’ spell, walking among rows of buildings that once used to be the ground on which acacias stood, listening to grown ups talking management, to feeling grown up when doing post graduation, seeing people walk by with red or black flags, and realising how childish I was when I thought it was cool, because by then I had been there and done that…

    A few months back, I saw a newspaper headline that the university had been shut indefinitely – it seemed most of everyone were on strike, against each other – students, administrative staff and the university registrar, who had been manhandled by a set of students. The students were on strike for something that should be as far away from academics as possible – politics. The exams had been cancelled, and if this goes on for even a couple of months, perhaps this year, there wont be a convocation at all in the university.

    Now the university has silent rows of buildings, and kids waiting for their exams to get over so they can play cricket, cycle around, discover a world, listen to grown ups and think how cool itwould be to carry red and black flags and shout on the street.

    The university has always had people with flags, it still has them. Can’t blame them, it takes time to understand that flags ain’t so cool. Like most things in life, it is a lesson that can’t be taught, it has to be learnt. That takes time, and a part of life itself.


    until next time, dumbstruck….

  • Prince to star in RGV’s film

    In a fitting climax to the tale that started on 21st Jul, Prince, the boy who got stuck in a tubewell while playing with friends, and thereby got the nation’s audience to get stuck on to the picture tube with timely assistance from various news channels, has been signed on by the famed Bollywood director Ram Gopal Varma.

    Prince, who is thrilled about his meteoric rise in popularity after his relatively smaller fall, has already received grants from the state and central governments of Rs. 2 lakh each. In addition, a couple of news channels have also promised him a sum of Rs. 7 lakhs.
    In an exclusive interview, Prince has expressed his happiness at being signed on by RGV, ” I am extremely thrilled at this opportunity. After the incident, everything in my life is suddenly falling into place. I had immense faith in God and the media, and i always knew that there would be a lightat the end of the tunnel. I cant talk about the film details as Ramuji has asked me not to, but i am undergoing a fitness programme to get back into shape. You see, i was fed a lot of milk, chocolate,biscuits etc during my ordeal, and over two days, i had become a bit too fat. In fact that was what had made the rescue a bit difficult.”
    When asked if he was concerned about the fact that RGV dropped his actors after hyping them, he had this to say, “He does so only if they dont fall into line with his thinking. But that wont be a problem for me since i have proven my falling skills.”
    RGV, who makes no bones of his obsession for Mumbai’s underworld and its characters, has confirmed the news, and was more forthcoming in an interview. “Yes, its true that i have signed on Prince. I am planning to make a prequel to my film “D”, which was a prequel to my earlier film “Company. I will be tracing the making of a criminal from his childhood days. Because of Prince’s close brush with the underworld at such a tender age, i feel he is ably suited to play the character. In fact, i have boiled down to a couple names for the film – Three’s Company (since this is the third episode), or e (C for company, then D, and so… also i might be releasing it only on the internet. I am already in talks with You Tube for that.). I have also got the rights from the English rockband Dire straits for their song ‘Tunnel of Love’, ‘How Deep is your love’ by Take That, ‘Falling into You’ by Celine Dion and ‘Deeper Underground’ by Jamiroquai, which will all be used in the film. Talks are also on with Deep Purple and Deep Blue something for more songs. Shooting will start any time now.”

    News has just arrived that RGV already has signed Prince for the remake, as he expects the original to get panned by the critics.
    until next time, Prince, how charming…
    Disclaimer: This work is just a product of the author’s imagination, except for the money and the Food and beverage bit.
  • Carry on Doctor

    Any of you remember the ‘Carry on’ series? Old stuff, but used to get repeated on the movie channels, till the ‘latest movie on your screen’ wars began… Hilarious stuff, made you laugh till your jaw hurt… Only, my jaw started hurting a few days back without me laughing..
    now, i usually treat myself pretty well (yes, very funny, i knew that was coming) with the regular stuff available in medical stores, but this one proved a bit too complicated, particularly since i had a lot of (cliche/wisecrack) reasons thrown at me… like
    Me: My jaw hurts, at the junction of the ear and the jaw
    Friend: Judging by your intelligence, your wisdom tooth is long overdue
    or
    Me: Am not sure if its a wisdom tooth or an ear infection
    Colleague: yup, all that empty space in between, something’s bound to happen..
    Another Colleague: Hear hear!!

    Yup, i do get plenty of help, and anyways, after trying out simple home remedies like Crocin, Iodex at the joint and an innovative method of rubbing amrutanjan on an earbud and poking it into places where no bud has gone before, i gave up and decided to take some professional help…And the doc was the biggest wisecracker of them all…
    Unlike the modern day, cold, “show me the money” kind, this was an older, wiser doc with the most cheerful disposition i have seen from a man still at work at 8 pm on a Friday night…So from asking me whether i had recently encountered any nuts that were tough to crack, and almost making me believe that i should sneeze with my mouth closed, inspite of the risk of my eyes popping out (which he assured me could be done) he kept me entertained …
    And if he had any inkling of the real reason my jaw hurt, this might have been the conversation…
    Doctor: you know, its good to learn early in your marriage to treat your wife with care.
    Me: Agree Doctor, but why…
    Doctor: The junction at the beginning of the jawbone is very sensitive….
    until next time, dont drop your jaws…