Sometime back, our yoga instructor spoke to us about the importance of forgiving. While most of it I agreed with, there was one part where I thought i’d a different point of view. She said that forgiving was possible only if the ego had been eliminated (for all practical purposes). My point of view (which unfortunately i didnt have time to express) was that ego was inherent in forgiving, showing that the forgiver is in a higher plane than the one forgiven. But I am assuming that the teaching was fine, there must be a kind of forgiving I am not aware of…yet.
The same kind of thoughts assailed me, when i read this post by mathatheist, where she wrote about charity. (you must subscribe to her daily musings, a wonderful read everyday) She wrote about the need for love (as opposed to pity) in charity. I am in agreement with the role of intent in everything that we do. Intent is what will drive everything else. To be fair to self, I have negligible thoughts of pity in any act of charity. The way i have driven it away is via a simple thought – I imagine someone I love, struck with a fate that the beneficiary has, and compassion replaces pity. I believe there’s a difference between the two. But the compassion is tinged with an enemy that is not so easy to dispose of – the ego. It shows its presence with a smirk and an unhealthy, unnecessary reminder to myself that I’m in a position to donate something (however insignificant it might be) for a cause. But I am assuming that the acts are fine, here must be a state of compassion without the ego, that I am not aware of…yet
until next time, to land the ego….
PS. any Ayn Rand fan here? Egosim is an important part of her Objectivism philosophy, which i am otherwise a fan of 😐
and on the blog today “The Egoism that lurks” https://manuscrypts.com/test/?p=1489
why Ego is always an enemy? personally, i think there is positive ego and negative ego.
I think, to love others, one should love him/herself first. If you cant love you, how will you love others?
for me, positive ego is the realization of one’s self, it is like a state of being conscious about our own identity…
But on the other hand, the inflated feeling of ones superiority is destructive ego.
and yeah – I am a fan of Ayn Rand… 🙂
Not an Ayn Rand fan here but I see your point, all of them indeed. As for forgivness, what planet would that live on? Not mine, anyway. Good post, if not a little on the serious side for you. I’m missing the characteristic ‘until next time,…’ manuism.
What is ego?
I think Meer said it best in what to me is an essay in verse on the sufist way of life:
“Ishq mein jee ko sabr-o-taab kahan,
Unn sai aankhein milee to khwaab kahan /
Hastee apnee hai beechh mein pardaa,
Ham na hovein to phir hijaab kahaan”
I doubt Ayn Rand could have said it any better than that 🙂
The “I” would creep in.
Agree.
Someone once told me this and I believe in it.
Forgiveness, simply put, is giving up the right to punish someone.
Often we say, “ok I forgive you”, but hold it like a sword over the person the next time something happens or as a constant warning e.g. I let it go last time, or I stuck on even though, don’t repeat this again, I’ll forgive you this one time etc etc/ – we punish people because we feel, for that moment, morally the higher person in that relationship.
The day we give up that right to punish someone, in mind or by words, we have truly forgiven.
anoop: you’ve answered yourself, and i agree 🙂
ideasmith: its there, but ‘not always there’ 🙂
mil: ‘Your consciousness of your own identity’ or ‘An inflated feeling of pride in your superiority to others’. in this post, i was referring to the latter.
e: well said, though Rand wouldn’t go there at all.. nice to see you around 🙂
austere: yup, quite a bad habit.. 😐
kavita: oh, brilliant.. that, i guess is the definition of forgiveness that would answer my query. thanks 🙂
For those two descriptions we have two wonderful words in Sanskrit (which I’m afraid Ayn Rand couldn’t quite comprehend in their classical sense, though I personally have been a fan of hers): अहम् (Ahum), and अहंकार (Ahankar). The later is the personification of the former.